The First Of Many

I would like this blog to remain as anonymous as possible. It's really just to share the journey that I'm about to embark on.
I've been fat for a while now. And yes, I say fat because I'm fat. Not 'big boned', or 'medical problems'. I did this to myself, not it's up to me to get myself out of it. I long to wear a sundress and not have to worry about how it fits, or if it'll show my arms. I WANT TO BURN MY JACKET, the one that I hide under to make myself feel better.

So from here on out these are the things I'm cutting out of my life:
1. Soda
2. Candy of ANY KIND
3. Ice Cream
4. Most meats (expect chicken and seafood)
5. Fried everything
6. Fast Food

Now the hard part of this is that I'm a server at a popular world wide chain restaurant. It'll be the biggest temptation to not grab a fry out of the kitchen or a bowl of soup after my shift. But we do have an excellent, healthy chicken salad that I can have with oil & vinegar. Yummm.

So now we get to the personal part. How much do I weigh? A lot. 320 pounds give or take some. I haven't exactly weighed myself in a while because I'm so ashamed. And feeling that way makes me eat.... which makes me gain weight!! It's a never ending cycle of feelings, hunger, and guilt!!! And my stop is now! I'm leaving this train wreck and making a new start for myself. I'm 21 years old and it's time for a rebirth- a new me.

My mom really wanted to see me as a healthier individual before she died. I'm so sorry mom, that I never could show you my will power. I love you.


-V

“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
― Shel Silverstein